Just one of those things

We seem to be suffering a bit of a relapse. Two of the last three days, our son has dirtied his pants. He's four years old and this proves that we still have a bit of work to do.

I would never tell him this but it is just a matter of laziness. He is very content just playing with his cars and cannot be bothered going upstairs. The biggest challenge for me keeping my emotions in check occurs when he denies having gone in his pants. When I ask him if he is dirty and he tells me no, but then I check and the answer should have been yes, that is when I have to really practice everything I know about keeping the child on the right track to complete independence.

What is it that I know?

Remaining positive is the most important. You might think that you need to threaten or yell to make sure your child understands, but that will only be a disservice. Make sure the child knows that going in the toilet is preferable and that you are there to help. If the child denies having gone in his pants then that might be sign that he is afraid.

Use the carrot rather than the stick. And what is the carrot in this case? Positive reinforcement, maybe a treat, at the very least, just good feelings and happy "good boy" talk